Recently I have had a few friends voice concerns about me “changing” or having “changed” I know this comes from a good place and a hope that my personality wasn’t buried with Logan, but I tend to think change is inevitable and quite often a good thing.
We all change, humans change, that’s what we do and in cases where something THIS traumatic happens, it would be rather odd not to change.
I mean just a few months ago, it was a Monday, my husband was finally a qualified detective and we wouldn’t have to do the long distance marriage thing again EXTREME HIGH, that night my family was told that the doctors where doing all they could for Logan and myself, but our chances of survival did not look good EXTREME LOW, the next day I was told my son was alive and well (me too, they didn’t have to tell me that, obviously) and that the nurse’s biggest complaint with him was that he was so bouncy and busy he wouldn’t lay still in incubator, making administering meds to him difficult EXTREME HIGH, the next morning I’m told I get to meet my little man MOST EXTREME HIGH EVER then less than an hour later I’m told he had a brain bleed and passed away MOST GUT WRENCHING NAUSEATING LOW EVER!!!
How do you come out of that unchanged? It feels like my soul has been blanched, how can I be expected to be the same naive happy go lucky (albeit extremely emo) person I always was?
Fundamentally I’m the same, I laugh at the same silly jokes, I get upset at most of the same old things and I still love my family, God, my friends and fashion.
But I see things a little differently now, how could I not.
If you know someone who went through something like this or even went through it yourself I’m willing to bet, CHANGE OCCURRED, because you cant put a broken heart back together without a few cracks showing and change really isnt always a bad thing, caterpillars had to change to become butterflies. . .
Have a great Tuesday, it’s super, toes are about to fall off cold here.
Changing = Growing!!!!
wow, i just had to write something.
just that you are strong. and keep on!
🙂