What I miss about the pre-kid days

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It’s not the late nights out, leaving the house at a moments notice,peeing in peace, or the skinny little body (okay maybe those things too) but what I really miss is the SILENCE.

Just me and my thoughts hummm, now its more like hummmm *don’t touch that dont eat that* hummmm *step away from that* hummmm *arg I give up*.

I love my boy and his way of looking at the world, how he says things like “daddy always says no he must say yes a little” and how I know he was up to mischief when he starts a sentence with…”mommy you must not be cross”. But with all the love I have for him I sometimes miss the silence of the before days

I was chatting to a friend the other day about “me time” and sharing what that meant to us…”if you could do anything right now, what would you do?” and while she described a delightful scene of warm beaches and cocktails my fantasy was a little different.
I want one of the trips I used to go on(as a lifestyle reporter) a generic hotel room,hours to kill and soul satisfying silence.

I’m a bit of a chatter box myself (less so, as I get older) also I talk when I’m nervous or awkward to fill in the silence (symptom of my social anxiety) So this might come as a surprise to many.
To me silence is the most healing thing, when I’m feeling overwhelmed everyone just needs to shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh…there is no radio in my craft room and if I’m really on edge the radio in the car gets put off.

But lately my search for silence is as fruitless as my search for chocolate that makes you skinny. here’s my problem…Rob gets it (most of the time he gets it, but he can talk your ear off, shocker I know), my mom gets it, most people get it, if you know me well you will know I sometimes need a solitude recharge…you know who doesn’t get it? my son

Between him and someone at the office who is always talking my ear off  I actually haven’t heard myself think in weeks.

Aidan is never quiet ,he even talks in his sleep.
He loves pointing out similarities like, the letter C looks like a moon and bread dough is like play dough you can eat, but mostly he is filled to the brim with nursery rhymes. The cuteness wears off after a while and you think to yourself that you are one nursery rhyme away from losing it and accosting Humpty Dumpty with Itsy Bitsy spider’s water spout.

I’m sure I would be fine if he went around singing to himself , instead every flippen song needs to be a duet. Sing with me mommy (oh and you will repeat till its to his satisfaction)
Meanwhile he is going through life like that annoying friend at the movies asking “what just happened” “whats in there” or “what are they saying”

He is constantly asking what random people are doing and saying and it gets real old real fast…I don’t flipping know what the couple at the next table are saying or what you gran who lives 40min away is saying!
Ask me real questions “whats this mommy?” and I will reply “oh that is a so and so used for so and so”. Don’t ask me “what’s that uncle saying” (the one that just drove by) and don’t demand an answer and then tell me I’m wrong when I venture a guess.

I just want to be able to think , regroup and refocus.
I want to be a good mom who doesn’t scare my kid away from being inquisitive, or whimsical (he likes to take a object and “turn it into different things” and make you guess…if the pillow from my couch is now a hat a guitar or a horse…)
I just want a little silence …  But then his dad takes him away for an afternoon and I can get some me time and I can page through a magazine and colour in and listen to Carla Bruni (who I love by the way) and take a nap, and then I realise I really really miss my little chatter box and it has not even been an hour yet.

Although I’d love some silence given the choice between Aidan and solitude he comes up tops 95% of the time…whaaaaat im honest 5% of shut up isn’t much is it?

What do u secretly miss?

The other long distance relationship

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I’m feeling kinda sentimental tonight, a good friend is moving to another city soon and so is my sister-in-law and I’m just like HEY STOP EVOLVING I’M GONNA MISS YOU.

My sister-in-law and I come across as extremely different people, mostly because she is like almost 2m tall, a model and doesn’t speak much, but from day one she had my back and I love her for that. She’s not the most open of people, but she always makes me feel like my opinion matters and I’d be lying if I said I won’t miss her. I also know that my son will definitely miss his aunt Mandy, he is quite taken by her. 
I know the move is great for her, and just what she needs, but we are finally really connecting and it’s just a little sucky (for me) 

Just as sucky as my good friend Sal leaving , yes we haven’t seen each other as often as we liked because, life, but I loved having the option. Yes, we can stay in touch on social media and what not (kinda like we have been) but I’m going to miss her razzle dazzle, how nothing with her is ever just plain and simple, breakfast for dinner is a three course affair and she has a way of putting you straight when you feel sorry for yourself, you know those,”but did you die”, friends. I just feel like, “come you don’t go” I’ll find a babysitter and we can dance till the early hours like we used to *sigh* sorry for taking you for granted.

You know how after high school you lose a bunch of friends and you promise to stay in touch and you do, at first, but life happens and new friends and new interests happen and you become *somebody that you used to know* (totally singing that right now)

I seem to be going through a second mass exodus of people close to me, Clay you totally started it, then Danelle, Tulz, Durelle, Neo, Trudy, Yolande.

But here’s the thing, I just realised it’s not like high school because  when you are older you value people more. For instance, I really do stay in touch now, distance has meant we have had to try harder. You tend to take people for granted when they are are close by, you are all, “arg we will catch up some other time” because it’s not like you are far away, there is always tomorrow.

When they leave and you really miss them so when they come into town you best believe you will make a plan, or spend hours on the phone or chat till the middle of the night or wake them up because you have no concept of international timezones (sorry Danelle).

Okay I’m going to stop being a selfish biatch now and wish my two newest fledglings well, I know for a fact the move was amazing for my other friends and I know it will be for them…and bonus HOLIDAY ACCOMMODATION, (kidding, not kidding)

Love you and all the best 🙂
Also to the friends close by, I’m feeling needy so be afraid, very afraid …. hehe

Real Wahms of SA; Marindi multitasks

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Today’s WAHM came across my radar even before I started this series.
I was minding my own business on fb (I lie no one minds their own business on fb) when I saw a post about busy boards and thought OMW! awesome idea!
So I was rather excited when the mind behind the business agreed for me to ask her a few questions and was even more excited to learn she runs an online shop and does photography as well…so here goes; Today’s Wahm is Marindi Fourie

Tell us about your familyWe are a family of four. My husbands name is Gregory. He is a Granite and build in kitchens and cupboards design and installation specialist. We have two children. Kaitlynn our daughter turns 13 the 29th of october and Kaiden our son turns 3 the 15th of october.We live in Strand,Helderberg.

Why did you become a work from home momMy son was a sickly baby. He had to stay with me because he had no imunity to germs. He had all the big ones! Meningitus,Pharingitus,hand mouth and foot,fever fits just to name a few. I remember him getting four different antibiotics in one month! Since his adenoids and tonsils were removed on 18 months old, he is a lot healthier.I needed an income so I started an online shop on bbm and whatsapp in 2012. Www.facebook.com/bubblebar has been my job since then. I want to build it up again but so little time does not allow me to do this currently.

What was the most unexpected part of becoming a wahmAll the work is overwhelming sometimes, as a mom working from home I did not expect my family still thinking mom has to do Everything. I sometimes find myself doing washing and dishes and cleaning everyday as fast as possible so I can get back to business.

What has been the hardest partTime management. And a 2 year 11 month old that refuses to go to a daymother or school. Most nights I work untill 3am in the morning, sending emails or organising and building boards just to realise as I fall into bed that my husband does not have ironed pants to wear in the morning.Getting everything done in one day really takes #mompower!

What is the most rewardingBeing able to be around my soon to be 3 year old boy and 13 year old daughter everyday. I am very involved in their lives. And except for my daughter going to school during the day , my husband , my mom and I are the only ones involved in their upbringing. The other big reward in my life is to be able to bring in an income and buy a little extra for us.

What is your day likeI wake up at 6 to see my daughter off to school and my husband off to work. Because I only get in bed in the morning hours I then get back into bed, do an hour of marketing and only get up at 8-9, round the time my toddler wakes up. I then make sure we eat and get toys out for him to play with , the Busy Bee Board helps a lot to get through the morning hours. Inbetween working and teaching and talking to my toddler i wash one load of washing,fold,pack away,make beds, clean what i can see. At 1:30 i leave to pick up my daughter from school, get shopping done,library or whatever else needs to be done. We are normally back home by 4. My son then goes to sleep and my daughter does homework. I use this time to start dinner. Wash dishes hang washing fold the morning load and inbetween i answer emails and messages and facebook posts. Take orders and do marketing. My husband gets home anytime from 5:30-7:30. We eat together and chat about 10 min. Kids and us all take a shower after eachother. Our 12 year old goes to bed around 9 and we then start making board orders. Toddler goes to bed around 9:30-10. Then I put all my attention on Business whether its making boards, new advertising. Selling etc. I literally fall into bed between 2 and 4 in the morning!

Tell us about your business.I am a professional photographer, own bubblebar online shop and Busy Bee Boards for busy toddlers.


Where did the business idea and name come from.Busy Bee Boards started when I was out of ideas of what would keep my toddler busy everyday. He knows how The tv remotes works. He loves pick a boo and word and excell on my laptop. He plays pazzingo on my phone, he takes pictures with my phone. He plays candy crush on my tablet etc. He understands technology like he has been busy with it for years. He has things that makes noises. He builds legos and big blocks and pipe blocks, he has paint and dough and books galore. He has guns and musical instruments and small and big toys. A bike etc. And yet something was missing. So I made a busy board and whalla…. I can get on with building my business!

What sets you apart.I truly believe in my product! I use it myself. My son plays with his Busy Bee Board everyday and I have had compliment from people about how skilled he is in working with fine and small things. He holds a pen the way a grown up does, he draws this way, and many times i have overheard people pointing and saying look how he holds that pen. If you know your product and truly believe in it, then you will be successful.

  Where do you see it going.I would like to pick up Bubblebar before Christmas again. With my photography ,i would like to become a birth photographer as my passion lies with newborns,babies,kids,maternity and family photography. I also enjoy taking portraits. For Busy Bee Boards I would like to grow into a fully functional 9-5 business. With employees and a factory. I would like to supply big toy shops and local supermarkets. That is my dream. Tired of technology and the many many plastic toys for kids? Get back to basics, get a busy bee board!

Links: 
Website:

Win with KidsBookClub!!!

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Chill time!!!

The Douglas-Meyers household is a reading obsessed one, Rob and myself both love reading and get ridiculously excited in book shops. Aidan is no different, we have to be like “only one book Aidan, just one” when we go to book shops and it often ends in tears. The thing is, books are expensive and we can’t exactly afford a mini library for him …or can we.

I recently learnt about Kid’sBookClub and I think he might be getting his wish of “lots and lots of books mommy”. The service gives you the chance to build up a library that grows with your kid at the steal of R145 per month. Seriously you get two books for kiddo and two magazines for mom or dad all in a themed bag for the price of a meal at Spur.
– you guys know what magazines are right? it’s those glossy things you used to read when you had something called free time.

Aidan was extremely excited for the surprise that was dropped off at our house.
He received two books one about what animals eat and one about something called a cloud baby(I found that book annoying, especially because he makes me read it like 100 times a day).

I’m really chuffed with the whole concept, the books are specially picked for your child’s age group and you can add an additional kid at R99 and a third at R89. Free delivery and a bunch of free activity sheets online make this a bargain! KidsBookClub even donates R1 to the Bokamoso Educational trust for every month you sign up for, which is a great cause.

 
https://www.kidsbookclub.co.za/cart.php
 
 
 
 

YOU CAN WIN A MONTHS SUBSCRIPTION WITH JUSTELLABELLA & KIDSBOOKCLUB

 
 
All you need to do is follow one or all of the prompts below and KidsBookClub could be sending you books for your little one, how awesome is that…go on it’s a great prize:
 
 

* Books received for subscription review and prize

kidnapped toys, bad guys and monkeys in the loo

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That was my weekend…

Firstly
Aidan is a bit of a smart aleck honestly a snarky answer for everything!!! He argues with me over everything, telling me it’s not night time it’s just dark or he isn’t drinking the bath water it’s just touching his tongue.
Sometimes his “cockiness” shows up as a discipline issue, like when he doesn’t listen to me and instead says, “whaaaaat, no mummy no, just wait a little bit”.
He refused to pick up his play dough things on Friday night telling me that I can just pick it up. I was so annoyed at the little man that I told him the “bad guys” wanted to take his toys and I would phone them and tell them to come over. The last straw was when he brought me the phone to call the bad guys (Maybe I was already upset that he was mocking me earlier by going to the naughty chair, sitting there and laughing, oooooh naughty chair naughty chair).
At the time I retaliated by telling him I would smack his bum and he retorted by following me around asking me to please smack his bumbum… This kid exhausts me.
Any who the bad guys came and took his toys. The play dough stuff (which are now in the boot of my car) are his favorite so it really did make an impact, I know this for sure as I overheard him tell my mom that he was naughty so the bad guys took his stuff.
He was much better behaved after that as the bad guys threatened to take Scout (his electronic leap pad stuffed dog) and I heard him tell Scout that he (Aidan) would box and kick the bad guys if they came for him (Scout).
– Please tell me you guys have used tactics like this to get your way, sometimes I feel outsmarted by a toddler

Secondly
We did the potty training thing this weekend and it was interesting, I told you guys all his excuses in THIS POST and at first, this weekend was not that much better. I kept him home on Thursday and Friday and turned it into a potty training boot camp. I put him in underpants and stuck a sticker inside the toilet to use as target practice, I just used a monkey sticker from one of his sticker books but I know you can buy proper ones for this purpose. Thursday was tough, he kept wetting himself but by yesterday he stayed dry, even taking a nap in his underpants…he went to day care this morning so that will be the real test…wish us luck!!!

PS. this parenting thing is hard!

Cheapy things I love

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Have you seen this egg timer it’s awesome omw it’s awesome so awesome I saw it at @home first but I think it was round about R300 and I thought I don’t eat hard boiled eggs nearly enough to warrant the price. WHAT?! I could buy shoes with that. Then I saw Crazy Store had it for R22 and I was like, “surely this can’t be the same thing”, but I bought it anyway because I like novelties… but the thing is it’s not just a novelty, it really works. Rob and I like our eggs worlds apart, he likes his so hard it’s blue and I like to dip toast in mine. So now I just pop this in the water with the eggs and when it changes colour to the soft mark I take mine out and when it changes at the hard mark I take out his. AWESOME!!!

Everlid containers have changed my world, the thing is we go through containers like crazy, honestly we keep loosing lids, It drives me batty. With these you can’t lose the lids, they are dishwasher and microwave safe and you can even freeze them… Confession I thought all containers were freezable but they aren’t, they shatter , we often cook ahead for the week and I have learnt this the hard way. At R180 for 11 it works out to like R17 each which is a BARGAIN!!! I love everlid containers.

Satiskin bubble bath is a shopping list must have for us, at R40something for 2 litres you can’t go wrong, I use organic baby soap for Aidan and although it’s good for his skin it’s not big on bubbles. Aidan is big on bubbles. I decant the Satiskin into a smaller bottle for him and because it’s not pricey it doesn’t break my heart when he spills while “doing it self” the smell is yummy and it makes a crazy amount of bubbles so I’m sold…

Have you tried the hug-a-mug range? I’m a huge fan, nom nom nom…it’s around 102cals a cup so it’s not exactly guilt free but it’s so awesome, the smell and the comfort level is soooooo high I could just bath in a cup… that is saying a lot as I don’t like baths, I find it too much like I’m making Eleanor soup. The price is higher than the other instant coffees at around R50 a box but seriously that is still like R5 a cup which is insanely cheap. Go to a coffee shop with a R5 and you can’t even pay your car guard, I’m just saying , looove hug a mug, I hug you my mug.

Woolies is singlehandedly sabotaging my get skinny efforts! I wonder if I could sue them like those Americans who sued Mc Donalds? I would ask for payment in snacks though (whaaaaat) These are my new favourites  Chocolate brownies topped with butter icing, pecan nuts and choc drizzle. Yes you read that correctly. It’s like a cupcake but instead of the cake part they used brownie. I DIE!!! They are tiny and are like 120cals each so this is pure indulgence they go for around R36 for 6 so you can get into a sugar coma quite cheaply…omw so good!!!

*This is not a sponsored post these are just things I had to share with you