Mommy Moment Monday…Cringe worthy moments

May 11, 2015Leave a comment

Mother’s day yesterday reminded me that I know so many amazing moms, I decided to start a series called Mommy Moment Monday where I ask four mom’s a different question every Monday for four weeks…then change the moms, to show that we are not all that different after all and because it’s fun to hear what other moms go through

Starting off on a light note (and including myself) this week’s question

1. Tell us about the time kiddo made you cringe

Eleanor and Aidan

You know all about me already…

Cringe: At a party he comes up to me and pleadingly asks me to change him
“Please mommy, please change my bum” I was mortified, it sounded like I was letting the kid walk around with a dirty nappy for days!!! when he
had just that minute wet himself

Cindy and Imogen

I call her my princess, she calls me Mamma, Mommy, or Mu-um depending on her mood. Imogen is 5-years old and in Grade R. I am a single Mom, trying to climb the corporate ladder while my daughter keeps my feet firmly on the ground – staying humble and grateful for being a Mom.

Cringe: She stuck a cooked carrot up her nose when she was about three years old because she wanted to be like Peter Rabbit, who happened to be doing the same thing on a picture on her lunch plate at the time. Her carer and I only noticed a smell coming from her nose a couple of days later. It took myself, a nurse and two doctors to hold Imogen down and get the now green carrot out of her nose. Cringing yet?

Luchae, Kyle and Karis

Luchae blogs over at myspreadsheetbrain she has two kids with a 12 year age gap so says she feels like she is doing it all from scratch

Cringe: One day, while catching a lift with a friends uncle, my eldest (who was 7 at the time) asked the gentleman: “Uncle, why is your car so broken?” Major cringe moment!

Zandile and Qawe

Zandile is the mother of a rather precocious 4-year old

Cringe: There are many cringe moments with my little man, but the most recent one that is etched in my mind was when he told his teacher – IN MY PRESENCE (I reckon it would have been better if I weren’t there!) – that I like to drink lots of wine and fall asleep. While I like drinking wine, I don’t just pass out thereafter and the impression created was that I’m an alcoholic mom who drank herself into a stupor and neglected the child. I guess to the teachers, that explained the little forgotten things and unsigned books.

Ranique and Adam

I am a young Mom who thought I had everything covered until my boy Adam arrived. I read just about anything and everything about being Mommy, babies and everything else that goes along with the change of becoming a mom for a first time.

This accompanied by my mother’s upbringing and influence as an old school pediatric nurse.
I guess you can say i am a ” modern meets old school” mom…
Yes I roll out everything for Adam with a modern touch yet I tweek things here and there because let’s face it, some old wives tales are true but am learning as we go on.

Cringe: apart from keeping his mom out of sleep 11 month old Adam has not done much to cringe about YET

Top 10 Yoga Poses for Stress and Anxiety:

May 10, 2015Leave a comment

Michelle shares some awesome tips 🙂

All of us suffer from some form of stresses in life. After delving into yoga and the link on how the postures, breathing and meditation can diminish anxiety, insomnia and all the symptoms, this weeks blog will give you tools on how to overcome stress. Firstly one needs to identify the triggers in life that bring about anxiety. It could be the food you eating, that you are dehydrated, lacking certain essential vitamins such as Vitamin C that influences our moods and metabolism. The triggers may even be unconscious and will eventual reveal themselves to you when you go into deep self discover through meditation. Once the triggers are identified, scrap out those ones you can control and let yoga work on the deeper triggers and to set you free.

Top 10 Yoga Poses for Stress and Anxiety:

1.Vrksasana- Tree Pose: Promotes concentration, focus and awareness, taking your mind away from common anxiety triggers and brings self awareness.

2. Virabhadrasana III- Warrior III: Strengthens and works into the core and helps improve digestion. There is a link between a healthy gut and fighting anxiety.

3.Uttanasana- Standing Forward Bend: The spine moves into the primary curve, known as the natural shape from when you were in the womb, subconsciously making you feel safe and comforted.

4. Lunge Twist Quad Stretch: Lunges energizes the body and with a twist working into the quads gives you that feeling of openness.

5.Paschimottanasana- Two legged seated forward bend: As your face moves towards your body, you will feel deep closeness within yourself.

6. Cat/Cow pose: Works into and massages the abdominal organs, and increasing circulation to these areas giving you a feeling of lightness.

7. Sirsasana – Head Stand: Reverses the blood flow, bringing more oxygen to the brain. It detoxifies the adrenals which contributes to fighting depression.

8. Dhanurasana- Bow Pose: For a boost of energy and to see life from another perspective. You will also learn that limits are self imposed.

9. Setu Bandha Sarvangasana – Bridge pose: Keeps the back flexible and healthy, opening up the frontal heart, where flexibility in the body mirrors flexibility in the mind.

10. Simhasana -Lion Pose: Releases emotions and feelings that have been stored in the body. By increasing the exhalation, more impurities are diminished. Practice these poses daily, holding each pose for a minute.

– From Eleanor, this is my favourite yoga pose…Aidanasleepsana 🙂

* Visit Feel Good Yoga studios every Mon to Thurs for our 9am and 5.45pm class. It’s time for you to feel good….

You know I shoot people, right

May 8, 2015Leave a comment

Since I’ve revived my photo business a little I thought I’d share a couple of my favourite shots, the rest can be found at MY BUTTERFLY LENS…. For those who did not know about this blog way back when when I launched , I started my butterfly lens after my son died, I take pictures of kids because I feel that even without death the life span of a “kid” is so short one minute they are building sandcastles and the next they are on the phone with their friends and want nothing to do with you, hehe I just think it’s important to note these changes through photography…

I don’t usually talk about race…but

May 7, 2015Leave a comment

So why break my “don’t talk about race or politics especially on the blog” rule? because it affected my kid…

Usually I stay quiet because I don’t like conflict, also I don’t like racism especially the micro aggressive kind, like she’s pretty for a black girl, nice for a white girl or smart for a coloured girl type things.

I also can’t stand when people speak of all white people as privileged and racist, black people as ignorant and criminal and coloureds as gangsters and opportunistic (black when it’s good, white when it’s good) it goes on, but I shall not because I know great people from most races and bad people from most races (yes black, white, coloured are not the only)… instead I shall relay Aidan’s story.

Yesterday we visited the neighbourhood park, it’s down the road and pretty. I see preschool transport wait there for kids playing every afternoon (not sure what the deal is) anyway the kids were playing and these two little boys (black – as reference, lol) migrated towards Aidan (pale skinned coloured – further reference), only to be chastised by an older child(also black) and told to get away from the Umlungu.

I was shocked because not only isn’t Aidan an Umlungu (he is at most a Bruin Ou) but I came face to face with such young prejudice. What has this child learnt, and from who, this child who can’t be older than 5 (she says she is 5,6,7,8,9) thinks that colours should be separated (I don’t even remember to do that in the wash).

I wasn’t sure what to do and her parents weren’t there to step in, so I just suggested they all run a race (I wasn’t trying to be punny just only thing I could think of), and they did, they ran and fell down and rolled on the grass they did it like a thousand times and Aidan was very sad to see them go…

So that’s it for my racial discussion, a lesson…be careful what you say and do in front of little ones, be weary of putting our emotions and past hurt on them, die koppies het ore (Afrikaans saying which means you don’t know who is listening, the cups have ears).

*I’m really loving Afrikaans sayings these days*

Diaper/Nappy box book case (independent play area step1)

May 6, 2015Leave a comment

I wanted to make a little, quiet play area for Aidan, someplace he could do his independent play while I get a little work done…for that I needed a book case because books are ultimate quiet toy…

So step one, how I made the book case

You need nappy boxes, two or there, I opted for two
Also need scissors, a glue gun, tape and wrapping paper.
I buy wrapping paper out of supermarket sale bins,
because you never know when it can come in handy
– this bug themed one was R4.99

Cut the tops of the boxes

Use your glue gun or other glue to stick together

Cover the box being careful to wrap over cut areas for a smother finish.
Sticky tape is awesome for this part…
you can then cover with contact plastic for a more durable finish

The end 🙂

Next week I will unpack what makes up my quiet corner
it cost me nothing just some reallocation of toys 😉

Grieving moms and mother’s day…don’t say stupid things

May 5, 2015Leave a comment

Mother’s day is coming up and it’s always a bitter sweet time for me, I always feel so lucky yet so incomplete… I know that when I lost Logan many people did not know what to do with me…it’s all just so unreal. I thought I’d share my list of what to do IF YOUR FRIEND”S BABY DIES because it comes in really handy when you don’t know how to act and keeps you from saying things like “you must be glad that is over” “Lucky he wasn’t around too long” “It’s been long now though”

Mother’s day is a sensitive time for grieving moms, even if they seem like they are “pretty cool about it” so keep that in mind 🙂

Mother’s day 2012

Mothers day after losing your baby is a cruel reality. Rob hates it if I say I’m not a mother, he says it’s denying our son, I don’t mean to deny him, I just feel that being a mother with no-one to mother is the cruelest irony! Yes I’m a mother, but I want to be a mom!

I have the wide set hips of a mother, the stretch marks, the (worse than most) c-section scar, I have the medical bills and mementos from birth, but that’s where it stops.
My heart aches as I write this, my arms long for a little someone to hold and caress and to sing to, I wish my “motherly duties” weren’t taken away so soon.
I’m healing, everyday I can feel God working towards putting my heart back together, but days like tomorrow hurt!!!
Moms are praised for their work, for late night feeds and kissing the booboo, for loving and taking care and with each advertisement on tv,radio,magazine, my entire being screams out, ITS NOT FAIR!!! I didn’t bail out on my duties on purpose! I want to stay up late with feedings and I don’t mind dealing with a cranky child! I wasn’t given a fair chance! Its just not fair!
It all feels so crazy like I entered a triathlon and when I got to the cycle part, my bike was stolen, I trained! I was ready! I wanted it! Its not my fault I couldn’t finish 🙁
I know so many women will share my pain tomorrow, through child loss and infertility! And I pray God helps us heal because this pain is something I would never wish on anyone.

Just Ella Bella