Category: me moment

When you are unable to can…

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Let’s all just nap (freedigitalphotos.net)
In the words of a good friend of mine, Zandile, who is as beautiful as she is funny (biatch)
Today I am unable to can!!!

Well not just today, the last week or so. Please tell me I’m not alone in having (for a fleeting moment) considered getting booked into hospital just so I can nap.

I’m not good at acting sick though, have never been, besides I’d probably upset the karma Gods and end up with a hospital infection. I’m what you would call unlucky/accident prone/awkward…

As I sit here typing I have a wrist I can’t put pressure on after falling down the stairs at my physiotherapists office, AFTER my appointment.

I have a rash on my face because the coating of my glasses is coming off and guess who is allergic to what is underneath.

I wont bore you with what the winter has done to my hair and nails, oh the brittality (yes I just made up that word)

Any who the point of the rant is that I am like many people this time of the year, so tired, my tired is tired.

I think mine comes from the beginning of the year when I decided to be a journalist again and like with any new thing I start, I was “ALL in”- “ ALL in” can be exhausting.

I resigned four months in and (determined to not have my family have to pay for my whim) I started working double jobs in my notice period.

The three months I was home I worked two jobs, I finished my online digital marketing course and I tried to get a business up and running.

I didn’t want to tell my boys they couldn’t have popcorn at the movies, that they needed to tighten their belts, just because I wasn’t feeling the 9 to 5.

I dropped the two job thing to come back to the office (Maybe if this was the plan all along I would have taken a day or two off). Determined to keep us afloat I have worked weekends and evenings and it was working.

Then a few days ago my careful planning fell flat when a months payment I was expecting didn’t materialize, there goes my juggling act, there goes my I can do this…

My need to please people (sure I can put a rush on that, hahaha) and my love of the Oh!Boy brand saw me / sees me sewing till the middle of the night. Meanwhile  my husband and son have been doing this tag team sick thing.

I find myself very close to sitting under the table rocking back and forth singing I’m a little tea pot, because YES I’m still short and stout, the best I have been able to do diet and exercise wise is not get any fatter.

My Dr seems okay with this, you know considering  the whole fatty liver and insulin resistance thing, but I’m not so okay with it.

Suffering from clinical depression for so long I know the signs, I know that falling asleep before finishing the lunches and not bothering to put a lick of lip gloss on my face are not good signs.

I’ve taken on extra shifts for the next two weeks (because, bills) and need to finish samples for  my new catalogue because it haunts me,  so this dream I have in my head of sleeping late and watching episodes of the new normal is just that, a dream!!!

Okay I’m done complaining now, at the crux of it I know I’m lucky I know that it’s just another day in paradise. I know that so many people I know are going through equally, if not worse days, I get that.
I know I am blessed to have a husband who respects me enough to let me do my own thing and who supports me even if I have to get lectures about slowing down every so often.

 I just thought I’d share my bad week and say, sometimes things SUCK! It’s okay, it makes the unsucky days even more unsucky (yes I’m taking liberties with the English language here)

So let’s all just have a little cry into our sugar free Chai tea and know that today’s sacrifice is tomorrows reward J tomorrow being rose water martinis J

the A-Z of being me

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I’ve  been lacking in inspiration recently, I feel like my blog is like a haircut which is growing out, it’s at that awkward, not big, not new, stage and I feel like, soooo what now? cut it (just drop blogging) or grow it (take it more seriously)?
I decided to do a blogger questionare to maybe inspire me… so here goes the A-Z of being me 🙂



A-  age? I’m 30 remember I did the 30before30 thing
B-  Breakfast? I really try but I’m always so busy in the morning, it’s usually all bran or chia pudding
C- Cellphone? is cracked 🙁 still works but don’t know for how much longer
D- Driving? I bought a little fiat palio, still prefer being driven around though
E- Eating? way more than I should be, woolies macaroons are EVERYTHING though



F- Fun? right now my idea of fun is watching youtube videos with my boys, cold makes me boring
G- Goal? to get fit an healthy and feel comfortable enough in my own skin to play with Aidy on beach this summer
H- Hair is now a shade of red that I love but can’t get to show up in pics…also totally embracing the curl and doing the twist out thing

Just woke up don’t judge



I- Instead of here? I’d be anywhere less wet, thank you very much
J- Job? a lot happening on that front was offered a lecturing position but the hours were too crazy and now it looks like I get my dream of 3 days in a office 2 at home doing my own thing, GOD IS GOOD
K- Kinda want amarula hot choc and macaroons but can’t if I want to loose weight
L- Life is good, I could do with more money but that was to be expected, otherwise I’m happy and blessed
M- making? things for Oh!Boy Kid’s accessories and Gifts&Goodies

N- Never expected winter to be this cold sheesh
O- Opportunities? been asked to guest post for a couple of websites which is awesome
P – Parenting is difficult but oh so rewarding
Q – Question season has started in this house why where when how, rinse repeat
R- Reading mostly blog posts
S – Studying online digital marketing and aced my first assessments, yeah me
T – Thinking way too much as usual
U – Unable to get into any of the popular series, zombies,vampies, thrones and emotional hospitals are not for me
V – Very annoyed at how long the alphabet actually is
W – Want people to be nice to each other


X  – Xerophobia: Fear of dryness (my skin right now is scary)
Y – You have been awesome to sit through this
Z – Zee you later

What a night out taught me…

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I went out on a girls night for the first time in forever! We ended up at a night club which I haven’t done since New Years 2013/2014 (I kid you not) …here is what the experience taught me:

not here yet at least…

– tights are now pants, regardless of size of wearer or translucency of tights it is no longer a necessity to cover your bum.
– bare midriff tops do not require particularly toned tummies or flat ones, it’s a free for all especially when paired with tights
– men’s pants are tiiiight now, leave something to the imagination people! between the men’s jeggings and women’s tights, night club is basically a pop quiz for a gynecology/urology students
– my music is now “old school” I actually heard a girl say “well that is waaaay before my time”
– takkies are the shoe of choice (not sneakers, no, I just jumped off a treadmill takkies) not even paired with a hot little number like on the runways or as seen on Rihanna… yes heels make some women walk like new born giraffes but gym clothes and club clothes should not be the same thing (sudden thought,maybe  they’re rocking slinky dresses in zumba class)
– it gets “late” much earlier, while we used to curse our curfews and swear we would stay up till the next morning dancing till sunrise “once we could” we never do.
– no matter how old you get, a good friend always makes for a great night
*disclaimer, I used to dress rather risqué “if it covers my butt it’s a dress” so party on girls 🙂 just be safe, I’ll be over here watching series in my onsie, till next time.

NOW

THEN

New Blog, New Me

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I know that today is Mommy Moment Monday, but instead allow this mommy to have a moment 🙂
I’ve updated my blog, thanks to Odette from OsoInspired . The thing is, my blog is very much an extension of me…I have been undergoing so many changes lately it seems only fitting that the blog would do the same, so there you have it, the new look!
What do you think? I feel like it looks grown up! also it was needed with the new domain and all 🙂 talking about new domains, did you check out Oh!Boy’s new website I needed to buy the domain as the free site names were way too hard to remember and relay to people…it’s supper easy to use so do go over there and don’t be shy to hit shop 😉

Other changes in my life include:
– A work shift (wont jinx it yet as there are decisions to make)
– Getting my body back, I’m eating better and getting more physical, because I looked in the mirror and wanted to weep!!!
– Taking care of myself better, the water retention is back and both my insulin and iron levels are not where they should be
– Being kinder to me, I’m extremely hard on myself, I can be a bit of a bully and really don’t want to be that anymore so I’m working on being nicer to me
– Take care of mental health; depression and social anxiety are real and I need to take care of me
– My first month making and selling Oh!Boy went really well, the plan now is to sell the end of range things and make a whole new range…I really want to keep doing new stuff, it makes my heart happy
– Studies still going strong 🙂

… I’m in re-invention mode and feeling rather positive about it all

Day one drop out…

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So it’s official I’m a student again!
I attended my first web based class last night and very nearly ran away…
I’m studying towards an accredited digital marketing diploma which I hope to use on the blog and also with Oh!boy.
I love learning new things and often sign up for short little self encrichment courses, but this one is way more serious, there are weekly assignments and a final exam!!!
I know some people are probably rolling their eyes at me thinking,uhm what did she think exactly? well I don’t know, I suddenly  feel so unclever (see I could not even think of the proper word to go there).
School/studying always came fairly easy to me, I was not top of the class but I have always maintained a B/C average without much effort and failing never entered my mind.Now it’s the only thing entering it. Maybe it’s similar to why I don’t like seeing guys who were into me during my University days ( now in my trying to fit back into pre pregnancy jeans days). I prefer not to taint their image of me. Maybe that’s it, perhaps I do not want to taint my own image of me, because as far as I know I’m still the girl who brings home distinctions, maybe I don’t want to discover that’s not me anymore.I swear as the lecturer was giving dates for assessments I was giving reasons why dropping out on day one is a completely reasonable option… It’s not like I want to become a digital marketer per say, I already have a diploma in print media and in broadcast media, so really this it is just greedy. My time could be better spent.With loadshedding I could lose my wifi connection at any minute, it’s better not to get too vested in it right now.
It’s weird this fear thing. Age has made me much less brave, as a youngen I would rollerblade backwards down a hill, now the thought is INSANE! “do you know how you could hurt yourself” I could party till the early hours of the morning “but then who will watch YouTube and drink Milo?”. I would see everyday as an excuse to dress up (I had that as a motivational poster on my bedroom wall and was once voted most stylish media person) now I’m like; “which pair of black leggings will I pair with my comfortable shoes today”.
That right there is why I’m sticking it out in this course, come what may, I need to challenge my belief system a little. Be daring (cause quiting my job, getting a refresher course in needlework and starting a kids label was not daring, hehehe)
But you get me, I’ve become too complacent, too frumpy, too mom! it’s time I look into what exactly it is being JustEllaBella!
and scene, so dramatic this Eleanor woman…I do take cute pics though,check it out on instagram, or tweet me or fb me or pinterest me 🙂