Not everyone is going to like you & that’s okay….
I’m 30 and still trying to get my heart and head to come to agreements on that one.
I mean seriously I’m not a fb status, I really don’t need to be liked…
It’s weird that I’m not more okay with the whole thing… I was never miss popular at school and even at University I think my popularity was largely based on being friends with quite a few “hot chicks”&”cute guys”.

I often tease that I’m like sushi, you either love me or you can’t stand me, I mean most of my closest friends found me annoying at first, I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard people say things like “you’re nicer than I thought”…apparently I’m great once you get past the first opinion (like those fireball sweets??) Im either too chirpy or too stuck up (how is that even possible? People make me sound like a mental cheerleader…. like I’m singing “everything is awesome” while holding up a “you can’t sit with us” sign)

So what’s bringing on this monologue…well I thought I was mature enough to get that some people won’t like me and it doesn’t matter blah de blah, but apparently not so much…I sure as heck don’t like everyone I meet so why should they. I also know that people are often way too busy with their day to day to care about giving offense so I shouldn’t beat them to it and take the offense …..hey luchae (she had a great post on the subject)

I realised in the last week despite my understanding of the situation, I still don’t like when people don’t like me… There was one nurse in particular this weekend who I swear was mentally rolling her eyes every time I spoke…she did the stiff smile, the glazed over look and my small talk was met with plain ignoration…I was taken aback, what did I do to her?!?
At one stage I told Aidan that the nurse would be cross because he was chewing cord of drip and asked her to just tell him not to (just a finger wag because she put it in and he was more likely to stop doing it)…her response “you’re the mother, deal with it” turns on heel and walks off…

I was so taken aback – I wasn’t asking her to parent him,just wanted him to see her agree with me – even so, I realised a part of me wanted her to like me (even though I didn’t particularly like her and overheard her tell another nurse that I was messing with her time by not holding the nebulizer correctly [despite other  nurse in question putting thing in my hand like that] also she kept insinuating that Mrs Meyers(me) gave milk outside of pre set hours, which I did not!…

I felt so confused a mixture of…”she really doesn’t figure into my everyday life so I don’t give a fig” & “what did I do to upset her, oh no! am I horrible?”

I feel like that every time someone unfollows me on Twitter,Facebook,instagram (even worse when I knew the person well) don’t get me started on feelings of inadequacies when I invite someone on fb and they don’t accept (it’s torture on my teenage soul – so much so, I wait for invites and never invite) I just always wonder what I could have done/said to upset them…I have a big thing about being the reason someone is upset,hate the thought

I no longer work for the biggest paper in the region and with that comes a lot of rejection…gone are invites and sucking up from PR people, I’m off the list and out of mind …that was to be expected though, the media world is pretty fickle, I mean I left the office I worked in for ten years with not as much as a farewell card and as a person who was always first in line with byebye gifts and cards I’ll be lying if I said I was not a little hurt.

But you know what? That doesn’t matter I’m not the invites or the messages … I’m just this girl who talks too much and who has amazing people in her life, people who have her best interests at heart at all times…and it reallllly annoys me that I care what others think

I’m much luckier than most(I’m probably gonna get a few WhatsApp messages and emails telling me to stop feeling sorry for myself on the Internet, because I have great friends like that)…I’m a good friend too (says me) yes I probably only know it’s your birthday because of fb and I don’t stay in touch nearly as much as I should but I’m the “drop everything and listen to you vent over snacks kinda friend and I’m always ready to help out so recon their pretty lucky too (hush up, you know you love me) ….

Not everyone is going to like you? And why should they! There are billion dollar industries based on things I don’t like, like coke,crocs and beer.

Eish just wish unfollow didn’t sting…but hey I’m growing! I now realise how silly I’m being… now for my heart to catch up with my head…