*freedigitalphotos.net

So like thousands (millions even) of people who have come across their reflection and stood mortified as they realised how close bikini season is… I am embarking on a “weight loss trip”

I saw a picture of me the other day and HATED IT!!! I look like an “aunty”! you know, like frumpy and boring and big… Now I firmly believe that you can look good at any size, you can embrace your body and be fabulous at any size. BUT! you can only do it if you feel comfortable in your body which I currently DO NOT!

Not only because nothing fits or because I realise it’s summer and I will need to expose my arms to the world or the world to my arms…but because I just don’t feel healthy and energised.

With my medical history; fatty liver disease, insulin resistance and unexplained water retention (they have run EVERY TEST possible) I have known for a while that  I couldn’t live all “willy nilly” eating just anything. For the most part I’ve been good, steam instead of fry… low sugar, low salt, low fat and my Dr. even commended me for keeping my liver from acquiring more spots and keeping insulin under control all without medication. So I’m not doing horribly.

I realised though that if I wanted to feel comfortable in my own skin again I am going to have to become more active and eat even cleaner…

So that’s where I am today… I’m embarking on (yes every few months I say this, don’t be judgy, I’m trying)  a health journey… I’m back on MyFitnessPal which is an app that diarises your calories and exercise and “keeps you honest” if used correctly. I’ve had great success with it in the past so it’s time I put the effort in again.

More than the eating thing though, I want to get more active, that’s the point of all this. I really miss “fit Eleanor” I want to be able to run and jump and body board again… I can’t even carry Aidan for a long time even though he insists (I’m not that heavy mommy, just try, you can do it).
I don’t know if it’s because the sun is out, but I feel like I should be running outside enjoying the weather with my son, but the stairs put me in ICU… so no more excuses! here goes nothing, no in fact, here goes EVERYTHING