Why your preschooler lies and what to do

My preschooler lies and that’s not cool

It’s particularly not cool when his lies include that I am a child abuser…

Lets back track, the other day I come home to him excitedly telling me that the teacher at school asked about the bruise on his bum and he told her and all subsequent teachers that myself and Rob hit him.

SAY WHAAAAAAAAAAT!!!

Funny how just the night before I had enquired about the same bruise and had to hold a mirror up to his little behind so he could see what I was referring to. We figure it must have happened when he went down a slide a bit faster than anticipated.

I asked him why he said that and he replies that I have hit him before…well he is not wrong, I’m a “time out chair mom”, an “okay now we take your toys away till you earn it back mom” and as a super  last resort for things like biting your cousin or me finding you dangling off the roof (this kid is seriously trying to use the jungle gym to get on to the roof)  I am “a swift wack on the bum followed by an explanation mom”.

I am NOT an abusive hit you till you are blue and you have to get the teachers in to call child protective services mom. The teachers took what he said seriously, just like I would expect them to, because you can never be to careful. But JOH!

Guys! was I ever mortified? Mortified, mortified. This not the first time Aidan has embellished the truth, however,  he has admitted to hitting kids at school and when I ask the teachers about it, they tell me it is just a story. He has told me he ate food which I would find hidden somewhere and would blame things on Caleb, when I clearly saw him do it…

I’m definitely not a fan of this lying stage BUT according to my research (parenting books and websites a plenty) we are at THAT age now 3-4 years.

Here is what baby center has to say about it all 

Why Preschoolers Lie:
  • You child might have actually forgotten they did something
  • Wishful thinking. Sometimes they wish they didn’t do something with such vigor they convince themselves they had nothing to do with it.
  • An active imagination. preschooler’s creativity is at a peak, and they may think that what they conjures up in their heads is actually true
  • A need to feel good. Creating stories makes your preschooler feel important.
  • A craving for attention. Your preschooler may have figured out that telling a tall tale is a surefire way to get a response out of you.
  • A sense of control. When your preschooler falsely claims that she was the one to rescue her baby brother after he fell out of the swing, she’s trying to bring some order to a situation that overwhelmed her.
What to do about lying

Humor your child.
Don’t accuse. 
Be sympathetic. 
Explain why honesty is important. 
Be positive, not punitive. 
Reassure your preschooler that you love her no matter what. 
Build trust. 

Let her know what you expect of her. 

For a full explanation visit baby centEr

*UPDATE: Feeling bad about lying about me bruising him, I come home to this “Mommy, don’t worry, I told the teachers my mommy says she didn’t hit me” So I’m basically just waiting for Child Services to call me now.

Do your kids lie? How to you handle it?

 

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