You know you have a problem when the worst thing you can think to do to an enemy is to make them live your life 🙁
I have many blessings, a roof over my head, a job, a loving family, great friends, but those factors are mutually exclusive to my problem.
The problem is I have nightmares most nights, hospitals, blood, grave yards, dead children. Going to sleep has become like switching on a bad movie channel, you don’t know what you are going to get ,but you know you wont like it.
Then there are the physical problems that comes with just having given birth, the discomforts and hormones-NOT A PICNIC when added to the day to day life of not being on maternity leave, its weird to have new mom problems with no new baby 🙁
I just had someone phone to set up a hearing test for Logan, AGAIN! it’s exhausting and hurts and sometimes I dont think Im strong enough for the role I have been cast in!!! I feel like there has been a huge mistake, this cant be my life 🙁
I feel like apologising to God, whatever I did to deserve this, Im SOOO sorry! I did’nt mean it 🙁
I guess I still have a long way to go, THE GOOD, THE BAD, THE UGLY
Today is THE BAD 🙁 I have many Ugly days, but I thank God for the faith that I will see the Good too some day soon
Romans 8:18 "Yet what we suffer now is nothing compared to the glory He will reveal to us later." *hugs*
So praying for an end to those awful dreams and for more good days to start peeping through. Sending you a great big hug my friend.
Thanks guys 🙂
I say all the time that I would never wish my loss on ANYONE no matter who they were. Sometimes I wish people could understand more but I wouldn't want it to be from them having gone through the same thing. I have had to deal with the loss of my son's twin (with this pregnancy) and I am still asked if I am having twins and it is so hard! So happy that you have your faith in God – I know without it I would never have survived <3 (((hugs)))
Revelations 21:4 – "He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away."