So the other day a family member raised an eyebrow and commented on Aidan playing with his cousin’s doll. They teased that I might have to buy him dolls soon *snicker snicker* I thought about it and wondered, why not? well my own reason for not buying him dolls is because he has like 15 teddies and doesn’t need dolls, but I don’t see why he can’t play with one now and again.
I always thought a child plays to learn or to mirror adult behaviour, I mean isn’t that why toys are miniature versions of adult things? mini musical instruments, mini garden implements, mini stuff?
I see it like this… Little girls play with dolls and learn to be mommies – well in theory. So what if Aidan wants to be a dad one day? why can’t he cuddle and hug a teddy or a doll? he puts his teddies to sleep sometimes, or shares his bottle or feeds them his chips. I guess it is because he sees me do this with him, and he sees his dad do this with him… Robin is by no means a “sissy” (ex-soldier, ex-firefighter and all) and he manages to be a great dad. He is very hands on (like most of the dads I know)
He also happens to be a great cook – our house operates in reverse to many others, with dad cooking weekly meals and mom cooking on the weekend (unless dad has had a brain wave and simply MUST try something out)- cooking is Robs hobby and Aidan loves to pass him spices and watch him cook.
So why can’t I get Aidan a cooking set? why is that “frowned upon”
When I was pregnant and found out it was a boy I was kind of freaked out because “What do boys do?”
Do they colour? Do they blow bubbles? what do they do?
Girls can do whatever the heck they want, no one snickers when a girl plays with a car or a kicks a ball around (okay some do but they are all around strange, these people).
With boys you get loads of opinions, like when his gran bought him a shopping trolley full of food for his birthday, some people didn’t “get it” , but what is not to get? men also do shopping.
I think kids should be able to play with whatever toy they want to, okay I’m not going to lie, if Aidan plays dress up I’d prefer him to be a pirate instead of a princess, a super hero instead of a housewife… But I don’t want to put limitations on him…I’m actually looking for a kitchen set for him, something that is not too “pink and pretty” not because I have a problem with pink. I just prefer gender neutral toys, like I don’t understand why those ride on horses are brown for boys and pink for girls, not because I don’t like pink, BUT because horses aren’t pink…unicorns might be so maybe stick a horn on it then I’d feel better, hehehe
but my point is….Aidan likes to blow bubbles, write ,play with play dough, make smoothies with me and even insists on using my lip balm, he also loves getting really really dirty, he plays with rocks and sand and sticks and water and he is always vroom vrooming, anything that could be mistaken for a car, also no ball can remain “unkicked” in his vicinity.
Growing up my parents were very open minded, I have some great memories of building things with my dad, and my brother enjoyed preparing food for everyone. Most of our toys were pretty gender neutral-many of which my dad (an electrician) built for us. We had a playground with swings and jungle gym and a big metal drum we used to push each other around in and for pocket money he would let us help him unscrew/reconnect plugs and wires in his workshop.
My mom played hop scotch with us and got on the jungle gym herself and we had a blast playing with edible play dough.
There was never a case of boy things and girl things…
That is what I want for Aidan, he is a boy who will one day be a man and I’m hoping he will be a well rounded one who can cook and clean and even horror of horrors, put a baby to bed.