Arguing with a 4-year-old

This past weekend I was getting some work done when my 4-year-old and I ended up in a bit of a heated debate.  I typed up as much as I could remember verbatim because, when he is older I want him to see what he put me through;

I know some of this might sound “above his years” but as the first time mother of a 4-year-old I’m not really sure what they should sound like…he mostly sounds like a mashup of the Lego song, Everything is Awesome, the My Little Pony theme song and the PJ Mask theme song. (he is always humming/singing one of them)

I have heard that he is quite a precocious 4-year-old though and you can HEAR him for real on our YouTube channel…Anyway here is what happend.

The back story is that I was getting some work done on my laptop, the battery on the tablet he uses to watch “his shows” had died and he wanted my laptop THEN AND THERE no questions asked. I said no and he freaked out, hits me and scratches me. He then ends up in his room…This didn’t go too well:

After chilling out in his room, his conscience gets to him and he comes to me with a book:

Aidan: Will you read this to me

Me: Not until you apologise

A: I’ll read it to myself then
comes to sit on the floor in my room…

A: I did say sorry you know

M: I didn’t hear

A: I said it super soft in my room *whispers: sorry mom*

M: That doesn’t count

A: I don’t know what counts and I said sorry and I read to myself and I don’t even know how to read, cause I’m only a 4-year-old, so you shouldn’t be cross

M: Well I am because you hurt me

A: I’m sorry *snaps at me dismissively*

M: Do you really feel bad Aidan?

A: Not lots bad, I only feel a little bad

M: Well I feel a lot bad

A: *trying to change subject* We should go back to the beach house and go have fun

M: *no response*

A: I’ll  ask you tomorrow when you’re not so cross anymore, maybe then we can have fun. how long are u gonna be cross for

M: I don’t know

A: Well what if I said I was sorry

M: What are you sorry for?

A: Hitting you and scratching you, I guess *shrugs*

M: *thinking we are getting somewhere* So you feel bad and want to apologise

A: No, I’m just saying sorry cause u and daddy want me to say sorry

M: Do you understand what sorry means

A: No, “esplain” it to me

M: Well when you scratched and bit me it hurt my body and my heart and you need to apologise to make it better

A: Your heart broken like that picture you never want me to press when you send messages? (emoticons)

M: Sort of

A: What if we used a magic spell or asked fairies to make me small and I went into your body with tape, could I fix your heart like that? Actually, I don’t know what magic spell we would use. maybe we should use a stick and dip it in a fire, water, and wine and it will be like a spell

M: Where do you get that idea from?

A: I just know things

M: Well climbing into people isn’t how you fix a broken heart

A: *sympathetic look* Is it cause you don’t know magic

M: no it’s because if you hurt peoples feelings you need to apologise, but you need to apologise for real and mean it

A: I don’t really feel bad for hitting and scratching cause you wouldn’t give me your laptop.

M: Well I feel bad

A: I feel bad about that mommy, I feel bad that I made you feel bad , can I say really sorry for that, and maybe you won’t be so cross anymore? and then we can be friends again

M: maybe

A: If I pinkie swear not to do it again? then will my sorry with fix your hurt feelings?

M: *hug him* because, parenting is difficult but figuring out life and emotions when you are just recently 4-years-old is even harder

A: Please tell daddy I said sorry He won’t let me watch TV if I don’t say sorry…


10 thoughts on “Arguing with a 4-year-old

  1. Amelia says:

    My husband says 4 was the hardest age ever. They’re in such a weird place of being babies but starting to think like little humans, wanting independence but needing constant guidance. I think you handled this well. I hope you took him up on the wine spell. x

    • ella says:

      That’s exactly it, its like mini teenage anxt, One minute he wants to be babied, the next he is calling his 2 year old nephew, sooooo babyish and boring and he want to do big boy stuff…GEE MY KRAG

  2. Heather Step says:

    Ah I had to smile. I also got an insincere sorry from my four year old when he jumped on my bed all wet tonight. But I was telling him he has to think of another way to jump without making my bed all wet. I thought I was getting around it by putting a towel on the bed but no luck.

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