Bad mom confessions and a prize for you

I’m a bad mom and I’m okay with that. Are you a bad mom too? If you’re brave enough to admit it, I might just have a prize for you.

I watched Bad Moms last night and LOVED IT (I know I’m late getting around to this one but I still haven’t watched Hunger Games or even Twilight sooooo).

There’s this scene in the movie when the moms are discussing their mom fantasies and one says how she fantasized about crashing her car and ending up in hospital. Naturally the other two moms call her crazy but there I sat watching the scene and relating to her 100%.

I’ve had that fantasy…like she says not a big crash with explosions and things just bad enough to get me to hospital.
Juuuust injured enough to need to stay in bed watching series while people bring me food and my husband and son come and faff over me during visiting hours.
I’m sure to score some new pajamas from my mom and I get to be drugged a little.
Don’t worry I won’t do anything stupid (maybe if I had that hospital cash back plan former soap stars always advertise on tv – where u get money back for every day you are in hospital – maybe then, but not now, for now I need to work and I need to not be completely insane)
The woman in the movie had four kids and a douchey husband so you can kind of understand where she comes from. Me? I have an extremely hands on husband who cooks and more and I only have one kid…so clearly I just suck at life. Maybe not life per say… more like I suck at adulting and (regardless of what MTV and 16 and pregnant will have you believe) you do need to adult to be a mom (even if you have to do it sooner than planned).
Mine wasn’t sooner than planned… In fact if you know my history you would know it was later than planned. I had Aidy at 28 and am probably one of the older mom’s in his class (first time mom’s anyway).

I realise that us as moms are really super hard on ourselves. We want to do everything and be everything no mistakes allowed. You need to be able to know the exact sugar and calorie count of any snack your child is given like some sort of nutrition Rain Man. Your kids need to be angelic wonders asleep in their own beds at an exact time every night and they need to stop being naughty with nothing but a threatening stare and the right inclination in your voice.

I digress… so why am I so tired? Well I work a lot (remember this awkward video where Aidy belted out in song how much I work) I’ve taken on extra shifts to get my finances back in order after more than one client thought that the invoice I sent them was merely a suggestion…

So yes I’m TIRED and that exhaustion makes me a bad mom and here are a few examples how:

Sometimes I:
– act like it’s later than it is so I can put Aidy to bed earlier
– let him have cereal for supper (even popcorn once or twice) because I’m too tired to fight
– totally zone out when he tells me something and just react on his reaction…He seems sad I’ll give him a hug and say “that’s okay”  and not have a clue what’s okay and if he seems happy about what he said I will give him a high five
– made him think he was lost in a shop to teach him a lesson about hiding in the clothing rails (he didn’t get scared he just told the shop assistant that I had gotten myself lost)
– bribe him to be good at the shops…”be good during the trip and you can have an ice-cream or go to the game centre”
– let him tell me bed time stories when I can’t stomach the thought of reading one more
– have secretly done work “behind his back” when we have movie night
– once woke up at 1am in his toddler bed to the site of him asking if he should turn volume down on my phone so I can continue sleeping and he can watch YouTube
– have lost my shit and pretended to throw a tantrum to stop his
– have been late picking him up at school

There are more things I’m sure,  but I fear adding to the list will have social services at my door… but yes that’s my confession sometimes exhaustion makes me a bad mom  but I sure as heck try my best

For the most part Aidy seems okay. He is chatty and happy and so confident he puts me to shame. The Simba chip sandwich lunches and having a mom that sometimes sneaks Amarula into her chocolate milk doesn’t seem to be messing him up too bad

What helps me is that my husband is really insistent that I take some me time. I usually take out one of my colouring books and just try not to think for a bit. It helps, I reconnect and then I can deal with my life a little better. It’s my meditation time.

Christian Art media has some meditation time for you too…If you comment with your own bad mom story you can win one of these beautifully illustrated colouring books and I will throw in a set of my all time favourite colouring pencils

Come on make me feel better and comment

15 thoughts on “Bad mom confessions and a prize for you

  1. Carla Van Der Westhuizen says:

    AAAH I LOVE this post and I LOVED bad moms! I recently became a mom, Harvey is seven months. And I am already feeling the pressure to be a good mom. Doesn’t always happen. This morning I dropped him off at creche and noticed all the other babies and long sleeve clothes on… Harvey was just in a short sleeve onesie. He didn’t even have socks on! OOOPS. I guess I just didn’t notice the weather. Sometimes when the evening is moving too fast and I need him to go to bed, I skip his bath. Just give him a good wipe down and powder him up so he smells fresh. And the worst thing I have done… He was sleeping on my bed a couple weeks ago. My mum always said “don’t leave him unattended he may roll off” Well he never rolled before (he does now), was fast asleep, and I needed to quickly make a cup of tea. Not even 5 mins later there was a thud and he was screaming. Poor baba was wedged in between the bed and bedside table. I had to move it to get him out. He was okay luckily! I think I cried more then him. I think there is way too much pressure to be a “good” mom and so much fear of being a “bad” mom. I think we must just be proud to be an okay mom! If your kids survived the day I recon you have done okay hahaha

    • ella says:

      you gave me such a chuckle with this. I know that school feeling. I have sent my son to school with no lunch only to get a message from the teacher *CRINGE*

  2. Taryn says:

    I absolutely Loved this Blog Post, only because i can relate.
    I am a single mother and most of the time its hard because i dont co-parent so im kinda the good and bad cop, All of the time! Most of the time my almost 6 year old is murmuring from the other room that i am A naughty Mommy but ive become use the fact that some times you really just have to give yourself a break or some kudos.
    Kenzo once had a field trip with his school. Me having to do everything remembered about the outing date, i just forgot what day we were on at that time and he so he went to school as per normal. Only for me to see his principal posting pictures onto their Facebook page. My mouth dropped to the floor as it had dawned on me that their outing was indeed that day. Needless to say when i got home he had it in for me. I felt like the worse person on this planet. I couldn’t believe i made my kid feel like a beggar. Took him a week to get over that and to this day i still cant forgive myself. Ive learnt that i cannot do everything, or be great all of the time. I try my, give him my best, in fact he has my all. Anyway…..
    ***Another Kenzo moment: is when i burnt his school uniform, and had to send him to school with a damp shorts….he wasn’t too impressed but wasn’t going to skip school and nor was i gonna not go to work.
    ***Another Kenzo moment: He refuses for me to put anything on his bread for lunch, and i refuse to send him without bread so he eats it dry. No Butter, No Cheese spread, No PB&J, No Nada. Most times i feel bad because my lunch bag is usually full of nice things and of course he has his yogurts and fruits but his bread as dry as the Sahara desert. His teacher probably think that we underprivileged but thats how he likes it. Anyhow im one of those moms that couldn’t care less what society thought about my parenting skills. I have a glass to make me feel better, heck sometimes (when he spends the night with my Parentals) i would let the hair down, because i deserve it. All mothers do. We work hard and love even harder.
    I could go on and on and on. My life as a single mother never has no ending but i wouldn’t trade it for the world.

    • ella says:

      Wet pants, shame def something my mom would have done hahaha. she was not about the stay out of school life. My kid also doesn’t like anything on his bread and I once got a message asking for something more substantial on his bread because he seems interested in the other kids lunch, he was 2, I was mortified

  3. Jill says:

    Solo… We were in PnP about 3weeks ago and as I put my son in the trolly I hurt his private parts… don’t ask me how I did that… anyway he stated crying and because a mothers kisses make everything better, my son said “kiss my tolly better mommy” I nearly died. People looking at me I decide to kiss my fingers and put my hand on his eina… like I what else could I do right… well that wasn’t enough… my son at the top of his voice says “no, mommy kiss my tolly better with your lips” and I did… terrible mother I know!

  4. sakeenah says:

    Bad mom right here! I work 7 -7 shifts so sometimes we come home late.. then I run a bath for my girls 8 and 5 and throw a crap load of bubble bath in and let the bubbles clean them. Sometimes mummy cant even bend over the bath to wash them.

  5. Melissa Javan says:

    You don’t suck at life – we are allowed to be lazy as moms, even if it’s not that much. The thing is moms consume their lives around their kids, we take care of these little humans for sometimes 24/7. It’s tough being a mom. You doing a good job, cereal at night and all. As long as he is eating and he is healthy. Great post – the accident thought has crossed my mind too.

  6. ChevsLife says:

    I watched Bad Mom with my son (I that a bad thing?) andwe both went crazy when they had that shop scene – we were dancing and laughing our butts off! But you know where she has the minor accident? Well throughout the movie my not kept fixating on that one thing!!

    This week my child never had a bath, yesterday he didn’t have supper, today he will be on his tablet for 8 hours and I will enjoy the peace because being bad feels soooooo goooood lol.

  7. ChevsLife says:

    I watched Bad Mom with my son (I that a bad thing?) andwe both went crazy when they had that shop scene – we were dancing and laughing our butts off! But you know where she has the minor accident? Well throughout the movie my son kept fixating on that one thing!!

    This week my child never had a bath, yesterday he didn’t have supper, today he will be on his tablet for 8 hours and I will enjoy the peace because being bad feels soooooo goooood lol.

  8. Michaela says:

    Oh goodness where do I even start , in the 2 years of being a mom i have had plenty of “bad mom” experiences. From my son going to bed after having a “dinner” of warmed cold meat slices (you know picky eater struggles) to him eating doritos/Frito’s/flings off the floor because his pretending to be a “doggy” and I just don’t have the energy to pick up those chips ( dirt is good for the immune system lol) .And i had to tell him the beach was “closed” because he insisted he was going there and not to school (at least Ill know where to find him should he ever bunk school one day) same strategy with peppa pig when his watched one too many episodes i just tell him she’s gone to sleep. Oh did I mention I’m a full time student and often stay longer at varsity for a little “me” time.

    PS , Jason is very much loved and does eat his broccoli and other balanced meals .

  9. Lauren Hewitt says:

    I haven’t seen ‘bad mom’ yet, I have given my son grapes, a slice of ham and yogurt for breakfast twice this week, I too bribe him to be good in the shops and I sneakily put my phone on dim some nights when putting him to sleep- the nights he’s taking long to settle.

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